In a series of focus groups with people caring for older adults with memory issues, dementia caregiving emerged as a powerful trigger for hidden family conflicts. One daughter summed up the experience: 'Families are messy, aren't they?'
The added responsibilities of care—medical appointments, daily decisions, financial management—can reopen old sibling rivalries and unresolved disputes, making an already hard job even harder for the primary caregiver.
Yet the same research points to a practical remedy: early planning. When families talk through roles, preferences, and decision-making processes before a crisis, they are better prepared to handle the emotional weight of caregiving. The message is to start the conversation about dementia care as soon as possible, not after tensions have already boiled over.